Four Month Monsters
After the unpredictability of the first weeks of a baby’s life, three months is a time when things begin to settle into a more predictable pattern: the circadian rhythm is beginning to develop, your baby is awake and interacting more and sleeping more predictably and life as parents begins to look less chaotic.
It seems cruel that soon after entering this settled period, one of the most challenging periods of an infant’s development kicks in and you feel thrown in the deep end once more.
Known to some as the “Four Month Monsters”; to others as the “Four Month Sleep Regression” or for those following The Wonder Weeks, Leap 4 – Wonder Week 19, it is recognisable by changes to babies sleeping, feeding and behaviour. Whatever you call it, most parents notice big differences between four and six months and start to doubt they understand their baby as well as they thought.
Thankfully, all these changes are part of baby’s development and are normal, though demanding!
Distracted feeding:
If you have finally reached the point of relaxed breastfeeds, reading a book or surfing on your phone while your baby quietly feeds for 45 minutes or so, the abrupt change to feeding behaviour at this age can come as a bit of a shock. Almost overnight, babies can’t focus on feeding and become distracted at feed times.
Until now, your newborn lived in a bubble, interested in their small world and oblivious to everything else. But in a rush of brain development, that bubble bursts and everything else appears. Not able to screen out irrelevant or unimportant stimulus, feeds are interrupted or abandoned altogether as sounds, movements and sights distract them. They are practicing their new skills: turning their head to locate a sound or visually track moving objects. Popping on and off the breast in response to distractions, babies often seem disinterested in feeding longer than the bare minimum during the day.
It helps to know that your milk supply is not to blame for this change in feeding and babies this age become very efficient and can take lots of milk in a very short time. Catching up overnight means they can relax and enjoy the feed without distractions. Breastsleeping is even more useful at this stage than the early days!
For now, limiting distractions during feeds will help. Turn off the TV, put down your mobile device, give your toddler some quiet toys and shut the cat in another room. Minimise conversation and use low voices. If out of the house, look for a quiet baby care room at the shopping centre, a seat away from the playground at the park or head inside at a barbeque.
Things usually settle by around six months, as their brain develops further and can screen out irrelevant information. Born sticky beaks will always be intrigued by what is going on around them and you might just have to live with it,
Short attention span and easy frustration
After enjoying playtime previously, reaching and grabbing toys on their play gym, that novelty has worn off. Your baby becomes frustrated when they don’t succeed and bored when they do. Some babies want to be upright all the time and won’t tolerate any time on the floor. Others don’t like tummy time or lying on their back and get cross when they roll and end up in the wrong position. The limited movement options at this age seem infuriating, as though they know they are only a few short months away from sitting, crawling and cruising.
Understanding this frustration and helping them through this stage is important. Try to offer them something new to do or see frequently through the day: you can set up different play locations in the house and rotate them from the tummy time mat to the play gym to sitting on your lap for a story and back, but don’t expect them to stay entertained in each for much longer than ten minutes!
When you need to do other things, pop your baby in a baby carrier: as you move around the house or garden, the constantly changing view will entertain them and you can chat to them about what you are doing.
Increased appetite for milk
As this rapid brain development gets underway, you will probably notice a change in feeding habits. Breastmilk is an important aid to brain development One 2013 study showed that breastfeeding alone produced better brain development than a combination of breastfeeding and formula, which produced better development than formula alone.
The frequent demands for breastfeeding, shorter feeding length and increase in night feeds often cause breastfeeding mothers to worry about their milk production. It is really important to remember that these changes are normal and do not mean an end to breastfeeding.
Breastfeeding is more than a source of food. This rapid brain development means your baby needs more of everything he gets from the breast: more energy, more relaxation, more comfort, and more reassurance. By continuing to breastfeed in response to your baby’s feeding cues, you can be confident your milk production will adjust to meet their changing needs.
Interest when you are eating
Many people see these changes around four months as an indicator babies need solids. In fact, one study found that many parents relied on two main signals from their baby in determining if she was ready for solids: a strong interest in food watching closely when others eat or reaching for food from an adult’s plate or disturbed sleep patterns at night.
Yet neither of these typical developmental behaviours is associated with infants being ready to start solid foods.
The recommended age to introduce solids is around six months. There are no benefits to babies in beginning earlier – there are actually risks which need to be considered:
The indications of being ready to introduce solid foods are:
· Able to sit upright and have good head and trunk control
· Able to reach for food and bring it to his mouth
· Loss of tongue-thrust reflex – which stops food being pushed into his mouth.
As the time for introducing other foods approaches, you will see them learning the skills they needs to eat and digest them. You will notice increased dribbling as saliva production increases; movements of hand to mouth, as they gain the coordination needed; awareness and interest when others are eating, as they learn through watching.
Their digestive system is still not ready to process foods, even though they might swallow food if you puree it finely enough! Babies are healthier if we wait until they are developmentally ready to eat and by waiting until they are, you can skip all that pureeing!
Increased waking and changes of night time feeding patterns
It is natural for babies to wake for breastfeeds during the night. It is also natural for adults to want uninterrupted sleep! The myth of self-settling and negative attitudes to night feeds has led to judgement of parents by how soon their baby "sleeps through the night".
When development surges, night waking will increase. Not only do babies wake for feeds, they wake as they try to roll in their sleep and as busy brains process the input of the day. Once awake, they need help to return to sleep in the quickest way possible: feeding at the breast.
Developmental stages do lead to sleep disruption and continue to do so beyond infancy. Sleep training is not appropriate under 12 months and ignoring increased need for night feeding can lead to reduced milk production and poor weight gains.
Weight gains and growth charts!
Development of the brain and central nervous system isn’t measured on charts. When your baby's growth slows, don't assume there is a problem with your breastmilk. Brain development, new mobility and increased activity simply mean energy is being used elsewhere and not stored as fat.
Remember that your baby's weight and length are only part of the information used to assess your child's growth and development. Growth happens in spurts - weight may increase one week, with length catching up the next.
Breastfed babies reach a weight gain plateau around 4 months. After the rapid growth in the first three months, it seems that growth in weight and length pause while the brain and nervous system catch up. When in doubt, offer more chances to feed, keep an eye on those wet and dirty nappies and consider ways to increase breastmilk intake before adding formula feeds or early solids.
